The 49ers

The year I look in the mirror, this is what I see
A blackness staring back at me
A child lost at sea, adrift in memories of you, only
How lonely I have become
The wicked years every one-fifty stone
We keep on stacking the boon
I keep dreaming I will wake up soon enough
To open my eyes in time to miss the cruel surprise
It is not you
Whomever I have a handle on
Until he is gone
In the mirror, I have not changed
Hard to imagine twenty went
Every one of those seconds
Every one of those nights
I love you, only
No matter how hard I try
To bury myself in the lie of my life, to survive
To thrive at all would be a truth lost
I suffer, as fools of love do so well
No other pain can honour bloodletting
Like poetry

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~ by Joy Suzanne Grazer on December 31, 2014.

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